So about once every two or three months I come across someone who appears really interesting and attractive. Given my introspective nature (I can stand in front of an audience and drop my pants no problem, but that’s a situation where there’s a purpose; approaching someone I don’t know based on a vague but insistent sense of attraction isn’t something I can do comfortably) it’s dicey meeting people. Finding an apt segue that would make my entrance pleasant and not a boorish imposition is something I look for but won’t force. And then there’s the setup situation, where a friend gathers two acquaintances together in a pen with the hopes that they’ll copulate.
Male: Soooooo. Hi.
Female: Euhm. Hi.
M: Sooooo… we’re. Euhm. How about that crazy weather!
F: Euhm.. like… it’s like… like yeah.
Friend: Hey! Have you guys !*@#ed yet?!
But I digress.
Then often I’m offered something with meat/fish and I’ll share that I’m vegetarian. Most of the time there’s silence. It’s typically followed by one of two questions.
- Do you at least eat fish?
- How long have you been vegetarian?
If either question comes up, it usually means that there’s a discomfort with this eating habit. Question one is to clarify how limited it would be dating me and question two to see what’s the likelihood that I’ll be vegetarian for much longer. The prediction of the intent of the question is confirmed when they ask question 3: “does it bother you dating someone who’s not vegetarian?” By this point it’s typically a write-off. They’ll either babble on as to how they tried to become vegetarian or ask stand-offish questions (do you ever eat meat? Do you ever smell a steak and wish you could have it? What if you were stuck on a desert island… ad nauseam) to challenge how much of a vegetarian I really am.
In short, all of this reduces one’s chances at developing anything.
“But, your’e creating a self-fulfilling prophecy with your negativity, assumptions and cynicism!” One, it’s a sartrean misanthropy, thank-you-very-much and two you’ll have to believe me that the very few times I meet someone I feel an immense affinity to I’ve an open mind as there’s the hint of a promise that I might’ve met someone.
As usual, I’d hate to leave you down based on a post, so here’s a song by Caribou, a band someone close to me introduced me to this weekend. Good times. Turn that motherfucker up, bitches. I’m out *drops microphone*